Friday, September 4, 2009

How much do you like you?

Speaking of books.... I'm reading (yes, still...) The Narcissism Epidimic. I got to the section today about measuring narcissism, and I thought I'd be off the charts! But lo and behold, I'm not nearly as full of myself as I thought! Take this quiz, and see how much you love you!

In each of the following pairs, choose the one that you MOST AGREE with.

1) A. The thought of ruling the world frightens the hell out of me.
B. If I ruled the world it would be a much better place.

2) A. I prefer to blen in with the crowd.
B. I like to be the center of attention.

3) A. I can live my life any way I want to.
B. People can't always live their lives in terms of what they want.

4) A. I don't particuloarly like to show off my body.
B. I like to show off my body.

5) A. I will never be satisfied until I get all that I deserve.
B. I will take my satisfactions as they come.

6) A. I am no better or no worse than most people.
B. I think I am a special person.

7) A. I find it easy to panipulate people.
B. I don't like it when I find myself manipulating people.

8) A. I try not to be a show-off.
B. I will usually show off if I get the chance.

9) A. I am much like everybody else.
B. I am an extraordinary person.

10) A. I like having authority over other people.
B. I don't mind following orders.

Questions 3, 5, 7, and 10: Give yourself 1 point if you answered A.
Questions 1, 2, 4, 6, 8, and 9: Give yourself 1 point if you answered B.

0-3 points: You have scored low in narcissism
4-5 points: You have scored about the same in narcissism as the average college student. This is a slightly above-average score for someone older than 40.
6-7 points: You have scored above average in narcissism.
8-10 points: You have scored significantly above average in narcissism.

So.... how'd you score???

My book....

So I have this crazy goal to write a book. Seeing as how I'm an expert at nothing, this proves a bit problematic when choosing a topic. I could write about my life, but I forget most things that happen to me, so there goes that idea. I could write about my friends' lives, but I forget most of that too!

So here's my new idea. I'm going to write the 2-paragraph story starters/random poetry-esque nonsense that I pat myself on the back for. Then I'm going to sell it at Urban Outfitters. New title: Super-short Stories of Toenails and Fleas.

Entries 1 & 2:

At the beginning of the summer she stumbled upon the perfect storm for a quarter-life crisis. Now, as fall lurks just around the corner, she realizes the doomed summer was just a catalyst for adventure.

The Cannonball
She gathered her courage and without even sticking a toe in, she waved goodbye and took a flying leap. With eyes closed, arms around her knees, she hit the water with a most satisfying KERPLOP!

And all at once she found herself completely submerged. The fish had a vibrancy she never before knew, as if the water were their permanent display case. Her eyes had been opened, and she knew without a doubt that she had made the right decision. And her world was never the same again.